Breaking Hollywood Stereotypes

Reap What You Sow

Larry the Rolling Filmmaker — Thu, 01 May 2008 16:28:38 GMT

I was re-watching “Trainspotting” on television recently and a song that played repeated the words about reaping what you sow. And the metaphor which is commonly used crept up into my mind using my work in it for the first time and as usual I grabbed my pen and some paper and began to jot down those thoughts.

I’ve been tilling the ground in my garden for many years now. I have cultivated the area into some rich and fertile soil. I have planted some hybrid seeds that through my endless research and work I have created and am fully prepared to make into a healthy crop. My garden is in the entertainment field and I have done all that I could and used all the resources that I have at my disposal and have waited for the one crucial resource that I do not control – water. It has not rained in many years. In fact it has been decades since substantial rain has fallen on this part of the entertainment field and maybe is the reason why I was able to place my garden firmly in this area of the field. But I certainly expected that if I were to cultivate this harden and clay like ground into a rich and fertile soil and plant it with my specific hybrid seeds, the water would come.

It’s worked in Arizona!

When the heavens still did not open up over my section of the entertainment field and onto my garden – I spent more time creating a wonderful irrigation system and went to those with abundant water resources to help me – give me some life giving resources and promised with a complete plan on how I can make a healthy and profitable crop when the harvest time comes and share with them the great rewards to compensate for the water.

I first went to the entertainment farmers, those who have great big gardens and could supply me as they have many other farmers and asked if they would send me a shipment of water in their trucks but none would even accept my inquires because of not being a member of their entertainment association and because I was tilling the ground they have either written off or never even considered to be a potential success for a garden.

The Banks and even the Government

So I changed my focus and after a lot more work created a proposal for the business community – the traditional water suppliers for all types of farmers and gardens. To my surprise even after having a complete business plan written and showing exactly how I expect to make a success out of my garden and have a wonderful crop they would not consider my proposals. It was not so much because of where in the entertainment field I have my garden but mainly because my garden is in the entertainment field itself and that is one they consider to be far too risking. When that came to light then I adding the fact that I am a minority farmer having a severe disAbility and because there are special programs out there to help those who just happen to be in a rural area – a less developed area of the country – I pointed out that my garden was located in the banished area of the entertainment field – yet I was unable to get far enough to show how I WILL overcome the objections and make something out of nothing and in an area that nobody has succeeded at before. When it was apparent that the traditional supply of providing water by trucks was obviously not going to happen, I dug trenches right up to their reservoirs and asked that they merely open the gates and allow some water resources to flow down and into my well designed and crafted irrigation system. But to no avail as they said this method is reserved for other farmers and gardens and that they only provide these exceptions to other less fortunate minority farmers and that they did not consider those with a disAbility as being among the disadvantaged (The Small Business Administration does not and in FACT you have to submit an exception form that includes proof that your group is both socially and economically disadvantaged in American society! This is when the facts are clear and known everywhere that the disabled community has the highest rate of unemployment and where laws have to be enacted just to make sure there is access to public and private areas of social gatherings and commerce.)

Back to the West

So I refocused and returned to the only place known to help those in the entertainment field and that was the farmers and workers in the entertainment field. Excited with more detailed information and a blueprint, my complete business plan that also answers any and all questions and objections to helping one who has his garden in the formerly known barren ground and area of the entertainment field and that I also dug trenches right to their water resources and so there is little they have to do to reap what I sowed – but I knock and knock and they do not even answer the door.

Over 96 entertainment farm owners, entertainment farm workers and those associated with supplying the entertainment farmers I have contacted and many of them multiple times and still less than 2% have even responded. Of those that did respond it was merely a polite and maybe PC gesture that all ended with “it is a great idea and I wish you good luck in your endeavors.” Not to say that I am not grateful for the encouragement and praise that have given me for my passion in this garden I have created – but it does nothing to help make the garden grow!

Many Moons and several Almanacs

This has gone on season after season, year after year and without having water to grow what I have sowed – there is nothing to harvest and nothing to reap! After a few years and continuous efforts and hope and faith that it will happen the next season or by the next year – I think you can see how my frustrations have been gaining in strength and size. But I still push on and even though I have had to work in other gardens by farmers or farm owners most of which are not in the entertainment fields but that is because they will hire a minority from my community of those with a disAbility. Some of these have lasted a few seasons but usually only lasted for a short term and regardless of the length I was always consumed with the thoughts of my own garden. Especially after I got it to the state as it is now – completely prepared and developed so much more than other first time farmers or wannabe farmers with a garden in the entertainment field.

Pie in the Sky

There have been times when I had to use a portion of the garden when I was sold on formulas and methods that promised a great crop and a lot to reap during a harvest that would not take as long as most and usually will less effort. I took the time and effort and resources to follow things such as internet marketing, affiliate marketing, pay-per-click Adwords, writing copy and many, many others. I would give it all my effort as I do with anything I am involved in but when I finally gave into the fact that it was not going to work I would till under the ground that I used for it until by necessity I was seduced into a different formula or method that promised big rewards all because my simultaneous efforts to attract water to my garden continues to go unnoticed by the others in the entertainment field.

I really am tired and don’t know how I’m keeping alive. I have very little income which currently is coming only from government subsidy due to my disAbility, I’m in debt and the only good thing is that I cannot qualify for any more personal loans to get me further into debt.

Purple Rain

I counted on being able to get some water by now. In fact I thought I would surely not only have the life giving resource but would also have reaped the rewards of my first harvest well before now! And when a couple of more seasons passed and a couple of years passed the point that I expected I began to rely more on hope and faith – and it became a daily hope that something would turn that day. That was a few seasons ago and so I am sure you can tell where I am today and although I have never just sat and waited or expected to have someone come by and give me help – I have always gone out there and asked and searched for assistance and you can see for yourself when you look at my work that I have shown on the website – exploring all areas of my garden and my trials and tribulations! But there are times when I sit in the middle of the garden and hold my head in my hands and wonder what is going to happen to all of this.

I used to be so happy and celebrate whenever any farmer in any field would overcome the obstacles and reap rewards from their garden and especially those who where members of other minorities that gave me hope that I would also have a day when I was able to reap – hell, I just want to be able to grow in my garden! But lately I am so tired and so frustrated that I’m not celebrating with them anymore. I am still happy for them and although I still do NOT ask “Why me?” I am wondering “Why not me?”

Recently seeing the whole nation being swept up in a Big Give to those less fortunate and many following that example I wonder what it will take to harness some of that from those who can afford to give. I have a cause and a mission that will give so much too so many with the labors in my garden that I cannot understand why I couldn’t find someone to help. Even if not for the cause or the mission – what about for the person? For a less fortunate farmer who despite the incredible challenges physically, emotionally, financially and socially that is added due to being a paraplegic and living with a disAbility all hours of all days!

Going to Market

I have tried to gain attention with descriptions of how colorful and how sweet the fruits of my garden will be once we get them some water to grow and then finally harvested. But that has not seemed to work so I use descriptions and details on how powerful crop will be and what it will bring at the market – which has a great chance of being very successful based on all other factors I have included in my garden and the farming of it! But that hasn’t brought any awareness or support either – sooooo even with the social conscious of this garden being what is so needed for so many is not touching the hearts of those who can help I know that the main issue of all of this is that I have not been able to get it in front of those who have the power and means to help. Once I do, I know I will be able to sell them on the idea or the chance of this barren land in the entertainment field becoming an oasis of success both socially and commercially! So I am no longer waiting for the perfect time to go to Hollywood and instead I am going and I will take it directly to them – meet them at film festivals and other entertainment field gatherings! How long will it take before I get that appointment – until I get that attention to have them consider an appointment? Yeah, yeah, time will tell – it’s been over 12 years now so I can only hope it will not be too much further in the future!

If you see me passing by your garden or at one of the many entertainment field markets I do hope you’ll come and shake my hand and say hello. Eventually all will know who I am and what I have done in this once barren section of the entertainment field and I will remember all of those who said hello and all those who ignored my proposals and labors just because my garden wasn’t originated in a prosperous section of this vast entertainment field!

What is the Problem?

Larry the Rolling Filmmaker — Tue, 22 Apr 2008 14:38:48 GMT

Some think that if the issues I bring up about the authentic voices and equal opportunity to represent ourselves as people with a disAbility is such a problem and has as much of a deep impact as I proclaim then why hasn’t it been addressed before?

That is a good question and I am sure it has been addressed but was obviously squashed before it got any momentum. First is the stereotypes and the way that most of Hollywood believes that only the stories and characters that fit into the stereotype can be made into a movie. I know this first hand as I have told you before that I have had my screenplays reviewed by some who requested that I make changes to make them more stereotypical. But I refused and besides how many stereotypical movies can you do? How many movies that focus and center on the disAbility, or are surrounded by a political agenda or how many after-school specials can you do?

But it is not all on the industry. You have to look at the very nature of the disabled community. Most of us do not want to bring any attention to ourselves and especially if it deals with our disAbility. Why? Because the very image and opinions of general public – the American society are that we are needy, dependent, unable to contribute to society and more of a drain on our welfare and medical system then most. This is the image and opinions we fight against and therefore do not want to bring any more attention to it. If we protest and scream about the fairness and equal representation in movies and television – or any cause for that matter – it will only contribute and perpetuate the very image and opinions we are protesting! Serious catch-22!

And of course as I preach about the influence that movies and television have on our culture and our society’s images and opinions – the very stereotypes and even the essence of the problem is connected so much that it is the main reason why the endless cycle continues. BUT this is where it must start – in movies and television programs. We have to break through – I have to break through to a producers, financiers, distributors so I can get my vision, my authentic voice and representation in front of the ultimate group to break through to – the audiences!

This is where it is a win-win. I want to get in front of as many audiences as possible. And so along with the specific 3 elements that I have included in all of my film projects, I also include the elements that all successful movies and moviemakers are looking for – a well crafted script (which has its own elements that make it more likely to become successful and considered “well crafted”), and the very next thing – Hollywood star power – name recognizable talent which I know I can and will attract to my co-leading roles next to my character and actor with a disAbility. I plan to first attract this Hollywood star power by pleading the cause and how great it would be for them to help me in breaking the stereotypes and helping end the discrimination against other actors! Then when they agree to look closer at the project I can get them to read the script where I know I will capture their desire to portray the co-leading characters in my movies.

The main elements of a professional independent production budget and distribution deal that includes a respectable P&A budget that other successful movies have is where I am fighting and have been fighting for the past couple of years!

But just like my fellow individuals with a disAbility working or trying to work in this business – I not only face all the same challenges that all of my able bodied counterparts have in getting funding and distribution support – but on top of that I am fighting the stereotypes and the discrimination the industry has on those with a disAbility – the very stereotypes and discrimination that my film projects address and will break! Another catch-22!

I cannot wait until we finally get the first step – the first roll in the right direction of this change that I have planned for and prepared to become a permanent solution to ending the seemingly endless cycle. It will be like the snowball effect and depending on the success of the first film (or size of the hill the snowball is rolling down) the faster it will become. And just maybe one that I think is a very good possibility if given the proper production and distribution support, will become a literal gold mine – the mother lode of independent films and one that I have prepared and planned already for so I can mine it for a very long time! This is the win-win situation in where I get to have the social issues addressed and provide the authentic voice and representation AND the financiers and distributors all make a healthy return on investment. This affords me the opportunity to continue and provide the long term answers to the current problems and finally break this catch-22 forever!

And because I am a person who cannot be squashed and will not go away – I will make my film projects with the proper production and distribution support this cause deserves and will not back down until I get it – all of the social issues that I have been preaching AND the commercial success that is possible will come together in the same projects. How do I know about this? I have worked it from every angle for the past 12 – 13 years and I know and I can make it happen. It’s just a matter of who will I be able to influence to assist in this process? Are you that person? Do you know that person or someone who might be that person? Whether big or small contributions – big or small abilities that you have that can be added – United to this cause will be significant and never be forgotten.

Will you join with me?

What Do You Think?

Larry the Rolling Filmmaker — Thu, 10 Apr 2008 20:46:57 GMT

Do you think the general publics’ opinions, views, and treatment of those with a disAbility are fair and equal to those who are able bodied?

Do you think those with a disAbility deserve to be treated fairly and equally? Is that only in some circumstances, or all aspects of society?

Do you think some of the opinions of society, the general public are influenced by their culture?

Do you think that movies and television affect the culture?

Do you think that repeated stereotypes and misrepresentations in film and television can influence the opinions, views and treatment society has on a people, a class, a minority or subgroup?

Did you know that nearly all representation of those with a disAbility are written, directed and performed by able bodied individuals? Does any able bodied person know what it is like to live everyday with a disAbility – and with the knowledge that it will never change – even after production ends?

Do you think that disAbilities, such as paralysis, deafness, or blindness and others are significant to the identity of a person just like their gender, race, age, or sexual orientation?

Did you know that in the 2005 Screen Actors Guild report on those with a disAbility showed that most in the industry believe that actors with a disAbility can only be hired for roles that were specifically written as characters with a disAbility? Did you know that nearly all of the already limited roles that are written specifically as characters with a disAbility are cast using able bodied performers? Double, double standard or merely just double discrimination?

Did you know that there are over 1200 SAG certified performers who bravely admitted by self identifying themselves as a person with a disAbility even though they know their disAbility will be stereotyped and discriminated against in the industry?

Do these performers and others such as writers and directors with a disAbility deserve a fair and equal opportunity to represent themselves in movies and television? Can you see the significance of this – just as any person within the majority representing a person of a minority subgroup?

Would these honest and authentic portrayals affect the stereotypes propagated and perpetuated by Hollywood and eventually influence the opinions, images and treatment of society on those with a disAbility?

If you could, with minimal effort, be able to help change all of this, the discrimination, the stereotypes, the non-genuine representations of a person not belonging to a specific minority subgroup – through supporting authentic voices and representations of those with a disAbility – just as fairly and equally that all other minority subgroups have in Hollywood – would you?

What Was, What Is and What Will Be.

Larry the Rolling Filmmaker — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 04:02:42 GMT

I go through these cycles of focus. I’m not really sure which one came first but it is a focus on the past films, or present films, or future films that feature a character who is paralyzed. And this happens for both my creative moments and planning as well as the business side. But I am very tired of focusing on what was and what is and want to be more positive because I like that energy a more and so want to focus most of the time on what can be.

What Was and Currently Is

I thought how tired I was of harping on what was and even as in the recent case with “The Diving Bell and the Butterfly” – on what is – those films are what they are – and I’m sure they are done by well meaning able bodied individuals and I suspect that most do not know and probably do not want to know what the real results are with the producing and distributing stereotypical films. Just as I am sure those filmmakers prior to the 1960’s and Sidney Poitier that films that featured stereotypical black characters and were done by well intentioned white individuals and had no idea what the real affect their films had on the black community and society as a whole. And as much as I would like to just focus on what can be, I am often swayed back into this arena in attempts to gain awareness in Hollywood – since showing what I have as a solution – they must need to be shown what it is they are doing and the real affects it has on the disAbled community and society as a whole! I do not have any control over it.

Besides this seemingly endless cycle I am also considering all of this for both the creative works and the business side. I wish I could focus more on the creative side as there is so much I want to write and then direct but because of my need of getting my creative work seen, gain awareness and raise support it means I have to spend all of my time with the business side of this cause! Especially since this has become my only means for personal support – I need the job. I need one that pays and I cannot let this cause or mission or business wait any longer. Damn catch 22 that not many within my circle understand!

I am so tired. And I could help but relate so much to a quote I found from the great screenwriter and fantastic director, Robert Towne who is the Academy Award winning screenwriter of “Chinatown” and many other wonderful films. He also wrote and directed one of my all time favorite movies, “Tequila Sunrise” starring Mel Gibson, Kurt Russell and Michelle Pfeiffer. Anyway Mr. Towne said:

“The amount of ancillary effort unrelated to what goes up on-screen by filmmakers, all of us, having to beg, borrow, and steal to finance, to go out there with hat in hand, the struggle we have to do in preparation just for the movies to happen, is a drain. It's like I was saying to George Clooney at a film festival recently, it's a drain on you, it's time-consuming, it's energy-consuming. You get to the point where you're so fucking tired you feel like you've already done the movie, just trying to get enough money to make it. In the old days, the amount of time it took to make Ask The Dust, I could have made three movies and not been so tired and thought, "God, I never want to do this again."" [On today's Hollywood (March 2006)]”

I feel that too. 12+ years trying to get the finance to do one of my screenplays and I am also am dealing with the huge barriers of Hollywood attitudes, stereotypes and discrimination. I am “so fucking tired” that it is unreal. Yet I have to go on!

“Luke, use the Force”

Still I want to focus on the future and what can be – what I want to be. Like the famous quote from George Lucas when asked about making “Star Wars” he said that he “wanted to make movies that he wanted to see.” That’s exactly what I want to do – see movies that are non-stereotypical and authentically represented. That is not about pity, oh my poor life – yes it sucks and yes it is very difficult but I look past that as much as I can in my own life. I want to see fun, dramas, comedies, action adventure, romantic dramedies that feature a character who happens to be a paraplegic and shows some of that perspective, the point of view as a person with a disAbility but without that being the focus or in a poor me setting.

This is where I lose some people when I say I do not focus nor ignore the disAbility of my characters and their stories. The best way to describe it is that I want to create films that will have an impact for the good. An impact on the disAbled community and on society – their images and treatment of those living with a disAbility. So I do create characters and stories that are like myself in some ways and certainly in attitude! I do not want to be “normal” I have to have certain accommodations to function and participate in my own existence and in society. I have to respect my disability and that should be recognized. This is where there is confusion among the public and even some within the disAbled community, especially the newly injured or afflicted. “Oh they just want to be treated normally.” Some think that also means that to treat someone normally means they do not need or want to have any consideration but I do not want to be “normal.” Normal is too difficult to define as it means different things to different people and as I mention the disAbility must be respected and there are some considerations that must be made. I just want to be seen and treated as an equal person, human being of our culture and society and not as one who is normal. After all I never wanted to be normal anyway even before my accident!

What Can Be

This is the attitude and the affect that I want my films to have. That is what I have written in my feature scripts and my short scripts and stories I will adapt into screenplays! This has been a life long dream – even before I realized that filmmaking was my destiny – I always loved movies. See my bio! So even though my life hasn’t turned out like I have wanted – the dream is still alive and I am still frantically trying to gain support for this vision that will affect millions and millions of lives.

On that note I want to add this. Many have seen it but for those who haven’t and even as a reminder for those who have watch this 11 minute video that he reprised and abridged for the Oprah Show!

I am not dying - although they say that my life expectancy is a few years less then if I were able bodied, but I identified with him so much - especially early on in the lecture saying he "chooses not to be an object of pity" and about being physically strong despite his infirmity! There are a couple quotes I love. “Experience is what you get when you don’t get what you want.” How true is that? And the one he had listed “Brick walls are there for a reason: they let us prove how badly we want things.” After 12+ years of brick walls I have proven it to myself – so my question is, now how much more proving before I prove it to Hollywood? Well, since it is Hollywood putting up the brick walls, who knows? So what was and what is are important but I really want to focus on what can be! And that about wraps it up! Until next time – “Ya’ll come back now, ya hear?”

The Diving Bell and the Butterfly

Larry the Rolling Filmmaker — Sun, 23 Mar 2008 13:45:05 GMT

The Diving Bell and the Butterfly

AKA: The desperate isolation of a pre-scuba diving suit and the renewal metamorphous of a butterfly! How profound, poetic and deep that is! According the movies that is what people with a disAbility are good for and that is what they do for society and not much else! But that is a pretty big role in life, huh? Yes it is but it is not the only significant role of those with a disAbility in our society.

Okay I finally was able to see “The Diving Bell and the Butterfly” last Thursday night. Fortunately it finally made it here in the little city in the very north east corner of Utah! This is another reason why I cannot wait to get back to SoCal.

I did go into the theatre with my pre-conceived notions and bias toward the images that are so stereotypical and in fact terrible for those with a disAbility because this is what the general public, what society contends that we are all like this transcending the human condition and an inspiration to everyone around us and if we do not fit into the stereotype that we do not have a place in society. When will we get any other depictions of our lives with a disAbility?

I still believe that this movie does fall into that stereotype and feel somewhat degraded by an able bodied director who was given so much artistic praise for his camera angels being from the point of view of the main character in the beginning because I wrote a short story/screenplay with what I thought was an innovating camera style by having the first half from that same POV. But at least in my short film story you do not know that the POV is from a person who is paralyzed and traveling through the able bodied world on his way to work – until the second half when the entire first half is replayed from the POV of one of his friends/co-workers! Here in Schnabel’s perspective and portrayal of a person who is severely paralyzed we learn that the POV is the main character right from the beginning. Overall though I did like Schnabel’s direction with the only additional exception was with so many hard cuts. I don’t know if that was by Schnabel’s design, the DP’s or the Editors. I understand the use or at least what I presume was his use in trying to show how the long days were filled with many of the same long and tedious actions – but it was done in many places that were not part of that typical daily routine and I do not know how others felt about it but it was bothersome to me.

Still despite it perpetuating the stereotype, and not really showing anything new about the world of those with a disAbility that wasn’t already done over and over again and in fact not that long ago with “The Sea Inside”, and the feeling that an able bodied director has stolen my thunder – my artistic method – I surprisingly did enjoy the film. The pacing and length of the film was good and it did inspire me, just not like it did for many others!

As I was sitting in the very back row of the theatre, the typical seating before wheelchair seating became more integrated (this is an old theatre and the main reason it shows the art films) and as I read the dialogue (despite having taken a year of French in high school it was too long ago) in the sub-titles I was struck by the lines that I had previously read from reviewers, “Besides my left eye the only two things not paralyzed is my imagination and my memory.” Ah, that I can surely identify with and because I have more functioning ability but still have my limitations being paralyzed from the mid-back down I had to add my passion, ambition and dedication. Then I realized – damn this is something I have been saying for a long time. If you read other entries to this blog or my bio on my website or in a letter I have written to raise awareness and gain support from one of the nearly one hundred person’s I have contacted in the industry, there are two commons phrases I use about my paralysis. The first that my accident happened on April 1, 1995 and I am still waiting for someone to jump around the corner and scream “APRIL FOOL’S!” and the second more serious common phrase is that my passion for filmmaking, storytelling on film which began a few years before when I was at the Art Institute – was that it was not paralyzed with the bottom half of my body! Proof that those with a disAbility do identify and have similar experiences with others with a disAbility despite the varying degrees or types of disAbilities that they share. But because I am sure that this statement was taken directly from the autobiography written/dictated by Bauby, it is probably more surprising that a Frenchman and an American saw things the same way!

Bottom line: See this movie and enjoy it – just keep it in perspective. Remember this is one of the common stereotypes and that not all of the 650 million people with a disAbility from around the world – or to be more specific those who are paralyzed to any degree, are the Dali Lama giving you perspective on your life and inspiring you to be a better person because you never know what will happen! I find this stereotype similar to comedians that I have heard say that when they are out and about meeting people for the first time are often and immediately being asked to “tell a joke, say something funny!” I am not saying that you won’t be inspired by some people, those with a disAbility but know that that is not our purpose in life! We cannot be expected to be one of the only stereotypes that society is exposed to through the media. We are as diverse as the general population of the world. Those with a disAbility make up members from every race, nationality, social and economical class, every age, gender, and of every creed. And the diversity of both types of disAbilities as well as varying degrees within each disAbility!

As a reminder the ADA defines a person with a disAbility as one who has a physical or mental impairment that substantially limits one or more of the major life activities of such individual. So you are just as likely to find someone who inspires you among the able bodied as well. Remember we are people and aside from some personal challenges that are different then yours we are the same inside. Now it would be a lot easier to do this – if only there were more portrayals of people with a disAbility in our culture which is often significantly influenced by movies and television and especially if those portrayals are authentic voices and representations! Damn, where will we find such a solution and one that comes in a nicely wrapped commercially viable package? Wait I have an idea – Click Here!

Is the Impact of Entertainment on Culture only Black & White?

Larry the Rolling Filmmaker — Wed, 12 Mar 2008 06:48:54 GMT

It is easy to dismiss movies and television as merely entertainment because there is a lot of mindless crap to choose from. But there is the cream of the crop and that is thought provoking and touches us emotionally to the point that we discuss it with our peers and colleagues around the water cooler well beyond just the next day. And then there is what is in between which causes some expression of emotion and some discussing but because it is in the middle of the road you will have some that loved it and some that hated it!

But today I am not here to discuss which films and television programs fit into which category and then rank them by quality. Regardless of where the film finds itself in the hierarchy of popularity, I think we all would agree that entertainment influences our culture which in turn influences our society. As an example, that I have talked about many times, is the influence the films of and by Sidney Poitier in the 1960’s. These films had a very significant cultural impact that played a role in the civil rights movement of that same time.

Present & Challenge Perspectives

There are two aspects of this that I want to explore further here. The first is the cultural impact on society as a whole and then how it impacts those that are directly being represented in the films and television programs. Although many of Sidney Poitier’s films contributed I want to just single out one in particular as it is a perfect example of our first aspect and that is “Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner?” This was in 1968 and I turned 4 years old but the film had a lasting affect and is still relevant today in the topic of race and interracial relations as can be seen in the Academy Award winner for Best film of 2005, “Crash.” Aside from a fantastic cast that starred along with Sidney Poitier in “Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner?” it showed and talked about race and the perceptions that one had over the other. Both sides, both points of view and as the parents discussed and debated and wrestled with their own perceptions it allowed the audience members to do the same. The dialogue was so open that depending onf what neighborhood you saw it there would be a lot of nodding heads with a soft applause or a thunderous praise and exclamations that were often expressed in the word, “Amen” as certain points were being made! So the audience members were now identifying with the characters on the screen which makes them engaged and personally invested in the story. As the movie moved along it challenged nearly every point that was previously expressed as general perceptions. By the conclusion of the movie, whether you agreed with how it ended or not, it made you think and it influenced your thoughts of your own race and your perceptions of the other.

Movies allow us to indirectly be involved with the story, the characters, the situations, on the screen in a very personal way without risking anything but the cost of the ticket and the beyond highway robbery concessions. Many films and television programs give us a peak and on some level experience another place, time, people, political system, point of view, a fantasy of the imagination, even other cultures and societies that can be real or make believe which can be as close as a local neighborhood like say, Little Italy in New York to distant solar systems and galaxies like in Star Trek and Star Wars!

"That's Alright Mama"

While we are examining the cultural impact as a whole let’s briefly look at the big picture and again use the same racial example and start a little further back to the previous decade of the 1950’s. Entertainment media of music was changing and although it started slow it took off when the rhythm and blues music became the basis for rock and roll. Regardless of how it was applied or exploited by the record companies and radio stations the voice of the black culture was integrated into white culture. This is common knowledge and when looking forward from that time we can see how it not only continued but also expanded to movies and eventually television. Not all was integrated but those voices that were not still had their place in American culture. And today the voices of the black culture are often dominate in some areas such as music. Today the American culture is influenced by black culture, white culture, Hispanic culture, Asian culture, gay, lesbian and transgender culture and some others as all have authentic voices and represent themselves in nearly all cases.

My culture, My people

The second aspect of this impact of entertainment can be seen in the affect it has on the individual culture and people represented in said movies, television and music. Again another example that I have discussed many time before, because it is very similar to how I feel when my culture, my people, those with a disAbility and specifically those who are paralyzed, is when I heard people like Oprah, Denzel, Halle, and others speak of the personal impact seeing Sidney Poitier in movies that were not stereotypical and portrayed by a young, healthy, and handsome black actor had on them. Another prime example was recently in an episode of Oprah’s daytime talk show as a retrospect of “The Cosby Show” and its impact on society as a whole and within the black community. When speaking of how at first many in both the white and black communities didn’t believe that a black family could live like that which was being portrayed on the show, I loved what Malcom-Jamal Warner said that unfortunately “it is not validated until it’s on television.”

The music of the 1950’s, the films of the 1960’s and the television of the 1980’s have all gone a long way in breaking stereotypes and acceptance of black men, women & families by white culture and society. Other minority subgroups such as the Hispanic culture and the gay, lesbian and transgender culture have followed the model or example of the inclusion of authentic voices in entertainment which has provided a significant impact on American culture as a whole which has its place in influencing American society and that of individual minority communities.

56 Million Americans + 600 Million More Global

The glaring exclusion in our entertainment of today when speaking of the voices and representation of all of the above mentioned minority subgroups is of course the largest and fastest growing minority subgroup, those with a disAbility. A very common image and treatment those with a disAbility in American society, which as we have established above is largely influenced by the culture which is influenced by entertainment and in this case specifically in movies and television toward those with a disAbility as invisible, insignificant, unproductive, 2^nd or 3^rd or 4^th class citizens and this has a huge impact on the individual lives of everyone with a disAbility and everyone in their family and of their friends. All of this is perpetuated in the Hollywood stereotypes, the industry wide common practice of repressing our voices and the unauthentic representation in movies and television.

Just like in the example of the black community, this not only influences society’s opinions of those with a disAbility but also on the disabled community itself and this can have devastating and long lasting affect. Without any representation in movies or television, society as a whole continues to view us as “less than” members of society. Because the disAbled voices are repressed and the discrimination of actors with a disAbility not being able to represent ourselves there is very little validation that we are significant and worthy human beings, let alone equal members of society. This flows over into our image of ourselves and the expectations of what we should just accept from society’s opinions of us. This can be clearly seen in the reactions of people when asked or they consider becoming paralyzed or having a significant disAbility. An example of this can be found here in this blog under the title, “Dr. 90210.” Many will say they would rather be dead or that living as a paralyzed person brings an end to significant life. This is experienced by all those who suddenly find themselves with a disAbility. I know this first hand because my opinions and views of a person in a wheelchair was a hopeless and worthless life. I felt pity that that poor soul who had to live life so restricted of nearly all that makes life worth living. It was unimaginable! That was until April 1, 1995 when I became one of those people in a wheelchair and not just for a time as a broken leg might do, but for the rest of my life! No days off and no vacation days away from living as a person with a serious disAbility.

Because of my attitude and outlook was what I can do with what still works on my body, I had nurses, doctors and therapists wanting me to speak to another patient of theirs who couldn’t see past the image they had as able bodied members of society that were largely shaped by the influences from our culture and entertainment. They were depressed and often didn’t care as it seemed worthless to keep trying. This life is difficult on so many levels and not just physically but also emotionally, financially, and socially as all are affected by my life as a paraplegic. It is easy to understand why the rate of alcohol and drug abuse is much higher within the community of those who are paralyzed.

If the very little recognition of those with a disAbility in movies and television continue to also be represented entirely by able bodied people then so will the results of the publics’ image and treatment of those with a disAbility and the self image of those who know nothing else or are heavily influenced by the portrayals of those with a disAbility in today’s entertainment. Then this viscous cycle will endure and continue to corrupt the image and treatment of those with a disAbility in our society.

Believe In A Change

But it does not have to be as bleak as the portrayals in our media depict. Nor does the negative affect of having very little represented in movies and television which results in not having any validation as being worthy individuals of our society. This perpetuates the almost constant treatment that those with a disAbility are to be considered as unimportant, unable and a burden which I cannot tell you how degrading it is and how difficult it is seeing this in the eyes of those who don’t advert their look in my direction and in dealing with every time I go out in public. And most with a disAbility will honestly tell you that this is more difficult then the disAbility itself. Can you now see how deep and how wide the range of impact this has on our society? It is incredibly hurtful and society can only change by what it is influenced by, which is largely from our culture that is influenced largely by entertainment and which can only be changed and have this endless cycle be broken with the authentic voices and representation of those with a disAbility in non-stereotypical roles and stories. And that cannot happen when the motion picture and television industry will recognize this as a serious issue and give those with a disAbility a fair and equal opportunity to represent ourselves.

The only question left is, does anyone here know of an intelligent and caring producer with well established relationships in Hollywood?

Next Step or Completely Delusional?

Larry the Rolling Filmmaker — Mon, 10 Mar 2008 16:51:29 GMT

Well maybe I am not the person who I always thought I was or was going to become. Nah, I do know that I am an artist, struggling yet full of life and wanting to express it through my writing and directing. I have written screenplays, both short and feature length, short stories in various levels of development and ideas that are always swimming around in my head. I don’t know if merely out of necessity or if there really is another part of me that is the business minded person. I have had to form the business entity, documents, create and write a complete business plan with financial projections, marketing and distribution strategies, statistics, market research for the motion picture industry and the segment of disabled consumer market, product distinction, product placement (both new companies looking for the opportunities and established ones that want to compete for the disabled consumer market), and how all of this can be a commercial success. I created a website, learned about html, Dreamweaver and Photoshop so I could make a site that because I couldn’t afford to pay someone I would make it look like it was done professionally to project the image of, well being professional. And then comes the part of marketing all of this and myself to the industry and business world. I have taken this marketing in every direction and covered every angle from traditional business loans, to government SBA Guarantees and programs, to individual investors, to Angel and Venture Capital groups, and when all of this failed to generate professional and financial support (as is described in detail in other blog entries and the website) I turned to the one place I knew would understand this mission and would have the best chance of support, to the motion picture and television industry. I have approached and attempted to get in contact with both the traditional studio and independent avenues contacting studio executives, from CEO’s to presidents and vice-presidents in charge of production and/or their publicity departments, independent production companies and individual producers, talent agents and agencies, and for the support of celebrities including those that for obvious reasons would have a personal interest in what I have created, all in an effort to get the financial and professional business support that this cause and mission deserve and I need to make all of this come to life.

Hope & Faith

There it is – the past 12 years of my life and my motivations to remain positive despite being paralyzed, the reasons why I wake up and get out of bed – which in itself is a miracle compared to my life as an able bodied person – all wrapped up in one cute little paragraph that I seem to be the only one who cares about it!

The backbone of all of this is hope and faith. What is it and why do some have more of it then others? I remember 18 years ago when I was merely one out of a hundred or so employees answering the phone to qualify our clients’ new employees for their company to receive a tax credit and presenting to the founder and CEO of the company a business plan for a secondary service that I knew would fit for the company. He didn’t bite but he took a moment and pushed away from his desk to look me in the eye and tell me how impressed he was with my initiative, the entrepreneurial spirit, the drive to put it all together in a very well constructed presentation, and the balls to come forth and present it to him. He said very few people have that and I thought to myself, why? It comes so naturally to me, something I just do because I believe in doing and not just talking or dreaming. Make it happen. This wasn’t the first time and neither was the time I made a complete business plan for my independent record label while I was in school at the Art Institute, and of our first album that would launch the company, a battle of the bands competition with a winning band in each of the major cities of the state of Texas to be featured on our “Best of Texas” hard rock album that I banked it all on and presented to a major corporation and first satellite music radio company who had stations all over the state and the country – who was just bought by ABC, only to have them tell me they loved the idea and would get back to me. When they didn’t and while I was following up I suddenly heard on their local radio station that they were doing it themselves – they claimed that one of their DJ’s presented them the idea before I came in! What was I suppose to do? Take them to court and face the team of corporate lawyers of ABC? Devastating but no matter it wasn’t the first time my dreams were crushed, I was disappointed at being rejected and my ideas that would rocket my company and my career were basically stolen and wouldn’t be the last. Besides I already discovered I had more passion for storytelling and expressed that by making music videos – which I began to make music video demos for unsigned bands to use instead of merely an audio cassette demo – this was an innovating concept in 1989. But unsigned rock bands do not have any money and when that idea didn’t pay the bills, and the freelancing as a video camera operator, grip, gaffer, and production assistant for other music videos and projects had dried up a couple of years into the next decade I had to get another job!

Ever Feel Like Something’s Missing?

Already knowing that film was the only place I could tell my stories that were a lot longer than the 4 minutes of a typical song I kept the hope that I would make it. But my job got more and more of my time as I moved from low on the totem pole up into management spending 14-16 hours days over two offices. Success was nice but I was missing something. This was in 1994 and I finally got some time on a Saturday to see a matinee that I found out later was from a new filmmaker and titled, “Pulp Fiction”! It blew me away and reminded me of what it was that despite the success I had a major void in my life. So I ended up quitting that job and began writing a short film I wanted to produce. I got a job with another company but as a regular hourly employee so after my 8 were done I had the energy and time to pursue what I really wanted to do in life! And as I was about to go into production on April 1, 1995 I fell down the staircase outside my brother’s apartment broke my back, crushed three vertebras, completely severed my spinal cord and left me as a paraplegic survivor. The new job I accepted in place of my salaried management position – had no insurance and I had no independent medical, disability or life insurance. I immediately lost everything – my condo in the Arts District of east Dallas, all my savings and money before I was even released out of the hospital.

Fortunately, I remembered what gave me life just before this life changing accident and it is what gave me the strength, hope and faith to continue to live life to the fullest despite this new reality and perspective from a wheelchair. When I went looking for some representation of people like myself in movies and television, I found very little and all of it was stereotypical and nearly all written, directed and acted by able bodied the same majority of the population who often cried in unison that they would rather die then to live as I do, paralyzed. But no matter they could still understand what it is like to be a paraplegic and authentically represent me in movies and television I say with all the sarcasm of a Don Rickles stand up routine! And since then I knew what I had to do and I dedicated my everything – which as I explained wasn’t much left – but my hope and faith in being a storyteller on film and since then, well see the first paragraph!

Deep Concern

Hope and faith have waivered from time to time in the past but now here in 2008, I wonder if it is wavering or fading. I have never given up hope that I was going to be what it was that I wanted to be! In the past I would spend months on an idea or dream and develop it to where I could present it and if it didn’t work out then I moved on to the next. It culminated into what it is that I really am all about and even if I never get the recognition, support or acceptance from Hollywood, I AM AND WILL DIE a filmmaker, a storyteller on film and an entrepreneurial business man. All of this I have committed to for the past 12+ years. Every time I got to where it seemed like it wouldn’t work out, I found the reasons for it and then developed an answer so it would work out. This has gone on and on to where I am now – I have the answers to everything, every objection, every question about making a commercially viable film from an authentic voice and representation of those who like myself are paralyzed or have a disAbility of some kind that would break the stereotypes and help end the discrimination of those with a disAbility in Hollywood. Wow, when I think about it that is a lot all in one package, huh?

Commercially viable
Authentic Voice
Authentic Representation
Non-stereotypical
And help end the blatant industry wide discrimination of those with a disAbility!

Whew! There is dreaming and there pie in the sky dreaming. Yeah, but you give me 5 minutes and I will hook you into the next 25 to explain exactly how I can do it and it will make complete sense when I am through! Ask any questions and if it wasn’t already answered in the presentation – well, hell it was covered I would just restate it or rephrase it to be understood! Don’t worry I won’t make you feel like a dumb shit for asking – in fact I welcome questions and objections because I love sharing what I have silently uncovered, created and overcome through personal trials over the past several years and now give an answer that is not only reasonable but makes such good sense that you will feel like a light just went on and wonder why nobody thought of that before! Fact is somebody probably has but because the industry of motion pictures and television is so difficult to get into – to get their attention to even be able to present it – they have either quit trying or feared it too much to start it. I haven’t but I am running out of options.

The Establishment

Sometimes I wonder what makes me think I could do something so big as it would change Hollywood, change American Cinema forever – hell I cannot even get you to comment in my blog or my new guest book. And that, along with not a single glimpse from anyone in Hollywood after all these years and attempts is why I am wondering for the first time – worrying really – that my hope and faith of this dream that would affect millions and millions of people would become a reality, is actually fading instead of wavering. Almost 13 years since becoming paralyzed and seeing the void and wanting to provide a solution that everyone from the making of to audience would be happy to see in movies and television representing those who were like me and dealing with a disAbility every day, every single moment of every day, of every week, of every month, of every year, of every decade, of every life that has been affected by a disAbility.

Yet despite all that I have been through, endured, and overcome and just when I thought I have finally gotten over all the obstacles to make this happen – my last obstacle is by far the biggest challenge so far has been Hollywood itself. I cannot seem to get anyone to look past my wheelchair and into the person. Into the work I have done to do what they hate to admit have not been able to do – provide an authentic voice and representation of a non-stereotypical film that features a character with a disAbility in a commercially viable movie or television program. Hell most do not even think about it – and when they do they don’t think it is a problem – or if it is that there are diversity programs that handle that so they don’t have to. Yet as I have proven – most in the industry do not think a disAbility is a minority and those that do, still do not provide a substantial program to help. If they did – I ask one question – where are the Hollywood supported authentic voiced and represented, non-stereotypical movies that either are or are not commercially successful?

Yeah, I know – they don’t exist. I have spent 12+ years looking for them and while some of them have some of the elements or partial elements, none have all three as detailed on the website and is required to be commercially viable. Instead of waiting on someone else I have created them myself and I can prove it if I could just get past the damn receptionists, assistants, and staff members to a real producer in Hollywood.

Fear of the Unknown and Unproven?

Is there something here – something anywhere on my website or blog that you do not believe is the truth. Why don’t you ask me? Challenge me? What are you afraid of? The truth? Oh, I would so love to discuss it with you, to the have the opportunity to prove it you – to anyone – to everyone! But maybe nobody cares that those with a disAbility does not have a voice, and honest and authentic voice – hell we barely have any representation and what little we do have is nearly all represented by able bodied writers, directors, and actors whose perspective of what it must be like to be paralyzed or have a disAbility of any kind is based and influenced by previous films and television programs of those with a disAbility that were also written, directed and performed by able bodied individuals. Able bodied teaching able bodied what it is like to be paralyzed or have a disAbility! Even when the material is based on the real life of a person with a disAbility, or they producers pay to have a consultant who has the same or similar disAbility on the set, it is still up for interpretation of the able bodied artist. Regardless of how good they were, or how well intended they were – they are still not my voice or my representatives in today’s entertainment. And motion pictures and television are often the face, the cultural representatives of a people, a profession, a subgroup, a minority. When do we get the opportunity to represent ourselves?

So what is the next step?

Just like all the previous obstacles that I encountered and found a way to get over it, under it, around it, or in some cases I have demolished them, created the answers to make them disappear. But most of them I have done silently and unnoticed because despite my efforts the industry has not seen any of my work, my screenplays, or my business plan. As I mentioned before, just getting Hollywood’s attention to what the problem is, let alone what I have to solve it, is by far the largest obstacle and most difficult challenge I have been faced with. If my countless phone calls, letters, faxes, and emails have gone unnoticed, ignored and dismissed what the hell can I do to just get their attention?

Hope & Faith Revisited

What would a person who has spent years and become desperate or nearing desperation because despite overcoming objections and obstacles he has not gotten any results, any attention, any consideration? Well if I cannot get Hollywood’s attention, I will have to bring the attention to Hollywood! Sounds a little frightening, huh? Especially when you hear – “oh, he was the most mild tempered person on our street”, or “he was always optimistic, positive, a real inspiration to everyone.” All of that is true and yet I can assure you that I am the most scared. I have banked everything, this past year on this happening. I thought for sure I would get someone’s attention now that I have a polished plan that includes the material necessary to be a brighter future for an entire segment of the population. But as the months passed one after the other, I now find myself in debt without a job and my only income is meager $679 a month form Social Security Disability Insurance.

I have awakened every morning with the hope that this would be the day I would get someone’s attention. That this would be the day that:

Michael Barker and/or Tom Bernard will take my call despite the numerous previous attempts when the receptionist would come back with –“I’m sorry they are both in a meeting. Would you like to leave a message?” or maybe that this will be the day that they will call me back after I have left the countless messages that included the recommendation from a previous COO and CFO of another Sony Entertainment division.

That the next person on my list to contact or re-attempt to contact will take my call, read my letter, fax, email, or accept my invite to visit my website

Consider what I have to add to American Cinema

Hope they would care about the stereotypes and the blatant discrimination of those that make up the largest and fastest growing minority, the 56 million Americans with a disAbility

· and

Care enough to act and not just acknowledge this is a terrible injustice and then wish me good luck

Everyday I wake up and hope it will be the day that will be the first real step in a door that could help launch this dream that is much bigger then me and as I mentioned affects millions of Americans, the 25% of all American households that have a person with a disAbility including all of their family members and friends who would want to see themselves and their loved ones with a disAbility being recognized as meaningfully participants of our culture, our society instead of being pitied and brushed off as insignificant people.

Nearly 100 and Counting

I have a database of 93 people I have contacted in Hollywood and that I have awakened every morning to put my hope and faith in that they will give me just a minute of their time to honestly consider any part of what I have created. To consider supporting in ways that can be as little as writing a mere sentence of their support – to say that they believe this is a good cause – to sending what they have discovered on my website or in my letter or my email, voice mail, or fax to someone they think might be able to help – to the producer or executive who would provide me a fair and equal opportunity with an invite to present what I have and is something that can be a permanent solution to the Hollywood history of a common practice of ignoring, dismissing, repressing the authentic voices and representation, the stereotypes and discrimination imposed by the industry. Whomever it is that does give me a chance and look at what I offer, I will be so pleased that they will be known as ones that played a significant part in what American Cinema history will record as a “turning point” for those with a disAbility on both sides of the camera.

Everyday hoping and believing that it would be the day I could get the slightest bit of a glance from someone within the Hollywood club. Do you know what it is like to hope for something so hard and for so long that you do not know how or what else to hope for? To do it for a dozen years and every night be disappointed and yet keep the faith – tomorrow will be the day – and tomorrow comes and you continue to go without any recognition from those you are trying to merely get the attention of. Feel like it might all be useless especially when it seems like you are just being ignored – dismissed as not important – not even have the decency to have James Cameron or one of his staff members say that he has looked at it and doesn’t think it will fly! Maybe they are so afraid to find out that there is no reason why it would not work – or why it would not at least be a worthy risk to try – and then because of the traditional practices of Hollywood, say they will not take the chance! “Oh, but good luck with that, it sounds like a great idea.”

I don’t care what the reason is anymore. I am tired of going through this every day. I will have to bring the attention to Hollywood and they will be forced to pay attention then to this issue, admit it is important, and needs to be more then just addressed by a committee or given some PC gesture of an outreach program that only accepts the application and resume of those with a disAbility with an out stretched hand and given the all to common Hollywood lie, “We’ll call you!”

Last Hope

ATTENTION HOLLYWOOD – Attention is my last hope of making my dream come alive. I am very much out of time and out of money. Just like the position I was in after my accident and while in the hospital, hope and faith is all I have left. I have given this my all and after nearly 13 years of work, creation, sacrificing, disappointment, rejection and keeping a smile on my face while staying positive every day that this would be the day and as I mentioned above I cannot be sure that this hope and faith that has been something I have had on occasion to dig deep to find every morning, and after a day of disappointments keep every night, I am very concerned that it isn’t merely wavering again and instead is quickly fading. Getting Hollywood’s attention is all I can do after completing all that I have and showcase on my website. If nobody in the industry will give me 5 minutes of attention, I will have to bring a lot of attention to Hollywood. As I mentioned before including the blog entry titled, "What's Up Doc..umentary?" that it would include a documentary film of my journey and naming the names of who I am calling, who I have already called and attempted to contact from my database of nearly 100 members of the Hollywood club while pointing the camera at Hollywood and it would also include organizing protests with disAbility rights and advocates, mobilizing the actors, performers, artists with a disAbility currently trying to work and dream in Hollywood, and make sure the entertainment news media is very aware of all of our activities! I have to get their attention to a permanent solution and groundbreaking inclusion of our authentic voices and representation that will change American Cinema forever. One step at a time and I can assure you, you will not be disappointed. If you worked this hard and this long, to the point where I am now, what would you do?

No Country for disAbled Men....and Women

Larry the Rolling Filmmaker — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 20:54:19 GMT

The Oscars were…interesting? Well there were a couple that were more interesting then others and I have to say my favorite part was seeing Jennifer Garner. But that is probably a given since I am a fan and well who would not like seeing Jennifer Garner? There were a couple of funny bits and my favorite was John Travolta’s 707 with its lights on (?) or was it just parked in the wrong spot? I don’t remember but it was funny. John Stewart as a host was okay and maybe because the writers just got back to work and didn’t have time to make anything that spectacular – but to be fair, I’m not a fan of Stewart and there were a lot more choices for a hosting job that have improvisational capabilities which in this case would’ve helped a lot such as Billy Crystal, and the two that were left out of the hosting montage, Steve Martin and Whoopi Goldberg and frankly I like them better anyway!

Still I do want to congratulate all the nominees as I think they were the winners in the 2007 year of movies! I think there were some that got snubbed and should’ve been more recognized such as “3:10 to Yuma” and “Gone Baby Gone” as I thought they were outstanding films and at the top of my list of favorites for 2007. But for the pictures that were nominated for Best Picture, I would’ve chosen either “Atonement” or “Juno” which the latter was a surprise to me when I saw it at the theatres. I know everyone was going goo goo for Ellen Page even before it was released but when I see that kind of falling all over themselves praise – it often turns me off a picture (ie: “Borat”) and I will then usually wait until DVD time – but this was an exception because…Jennifer Garner was a co-star and in my opinion she makes every movie she is in better. It was a good movie and did keep my interests. I did of course identify most with Jason Bateman’s character and loved his portrayal and that might have had something to do with my leaving the theatre rather satisfied.

And speaking of Best Pictures – I did note that during the 79 previous Best Picture winners montage that four of them did have something that featured or co-starred a character with a disAbility. The first being “The Best Years of Our Lives” and the clip they chose to show was with the character – and if I remember correctly the actor – had the prosthetic arm and hand raising that arm to salute. One of the first and only authentic characters. That movie came out in the 1950’s and we had to go all the way to the 80’s for the next one, “Rainman”! Not authentic but also one of the exceptions I talk about when I speak about disAbilities and the ones that cannot be acted by a person with the same or similar disAbility for obvious reasons – and I make that distinction because of what I propose and the fact that Hollywood believes all disAbilities are unable to authentically portray themselves. Ignorance, stereotypes and discrimination. Then I saw “Forest Gump” as the clip merely showed him running – of course it is never out rightly said that the Forest character has a disAbility, I think in his speech and thought patterns it is obvious he has some form of a mental disAbility. The fact that it is never spoken right out loud is a perfect example of how those in Hollywood downplay or completely ignore the facts of a disAbility. But this movie also had Lieutenant Dan who becomes an amputee and was fantastically acted by Gary Sinese. Technology was at this cutting edge time of movie making made it look so real because the actor did not have to sit on his leg to make it appear to be amputated. This is another prime example of when a character with a disAbility can be portrayed by an actor with a disAbility even when in part of the story the character is not disAbled. It works both ways Hollywood! And lastly was “Million Dollar Baby” but the clip they showed of course was with Hillary punching the speed bag at the boxing gym.

4 out of 79 is a lot better ratio then the amount of films produced each year and those that have a character with a disAbility in them! But still only one of them featured a starring role with a disAbility – “Rainman” unless you acknowledge “Forest Gump” as I do and therefore two of the four. The other two it was a co-starring role in “Best Years of Our Lives” and the lead in “Million Dollar Baby” became paralyzed only in the third act.

Another interesting note is that the two male actors winning Oscar’s – Daniel Day Lewis for a Leading Role and Javier Bardem for Supporting Role both portrayed severely disAbled characters in previous movies – “My Left Foot” and “The Sea Inside” respectively. Daniel winning his first Oscar for that role and Javier did get a lot of International awards for his role in the film that won an Oscar for Best Foreign Language Film of 2005. And I do comment further on the website about “The Sea Inside” and my take on it, if you care to read more! I also want to mention more talk on the Oscar’s and disAbility on Beth Haller’s blog at http://media-dis-n-dat.blogspot.com/2008/02/disability-moments-at-oscars.html

So what does all of this mean? It just goes to show further evidence of what I have been talking about and what I hope to help change. There really is “No Country (especially in the World of movies) For disAbled Men and Women.” And on the occasions that Hollywood wishes to allow and greenlight a movie about a person with a disAbility - it has to be written, directed and acted by someone who has never been disAbled. Although some might argue that some are partly handicapped!

Seriously, with little to no representation in the movies or television, society as a whole continues to view us as these “very much less than” members of the community, the nation, of society. Because we are not given a fair and equal opportunity to represent ourselves and our voices are repressed there is no validation that we equal human beings and unfortunately that often even flows over into our self image which perpetuates an terrible and endless cycle that includes some of the highest rates of drug and alcohol abuse along with suicides of any minority subgroup in America. Bet you didn’t know that. Of course not because we are represented by anyone but those who have no idea what it is like to live with a disAbility and all of this could be broken with our authentic voices and representation in the single most influential element in our culture – movies and television.

But does Hollywood care? Does ANYBODY in Hollywood care? I will keep looking as I am sure someone does care and care enough to help us represent ourselves. Someone who will look beyond the wheelchair and also see the incredibly difficulty those of us working – or should I more accurately say barely working, wanting and trying to work, and dreaming of working in the business - face daily and nearly everywhere we turn just for a hope of expressing our talents as our able bodied counterparts do everyday!

Meanwhile I continue to debate with myself on writing a screenplay – either a brand new one or an adapted or modified from one of my short stories, that expresses the true experiences of a paraplegic in today’s society. Showing the drug and alcohol abuse that is so prevalent among paraplegics, along with the interactions with people in the workplace, in social arenas and especially those of the opposite sex (or same sex depending on your orientation). The discrimination and stereotypes, the way many treat adults like children because our eye level from a wheelchair seems to be an automated response. How it seems if I am not a Super Crip or an Inspirational Gimp then I have no meaning and purpose or place in society according to some whose only experiences with those with a disAbility have been through movies and television. And I could write a screenplay that has many other circumstances and basic challenges a person in a wheelchair has to deal with every single day. A kind of “Crash” meets “The Waterdance” or “Coming Home.” It would certainly have to include characters that are interacting with Hollywood where the discrimination is the highest of all industries. Again for those who don’t know this is not just my opinion or the way someone interprets what is going on, but is from my personal experiences over the past 12+ years, as well as the experiences that actors with a disAbility share with me regularly and is documented in the only study of those with a disAbility in Hollywood and was published by SAG 3 years ago this May.

Would that voice be more accepted by Hollywood? Would it only fuel the stereotypes and contradict what my Mission Statement and desires to not focus on the disAbility? The only story that comes creeping into my mind during these inner debates is one that is semi-autobiographical. And although I am not afraid to expose some of that – I am afraid that it will be categorized as stereotypical or a one-hit wonder. But maybe that is a risk I have to take to get Hollywood’s attention, to give authentic voice and representation and to finally get back to directing – which is such a personal satisfaction and part of me that maybe that is what I will have to do – and then I can at least say I got to direct a feature film. What do you think?

I’m Coming Out – No More Lies - I’m Out & Proud!

Larry the Rolling Filmmaker — Sun, 24 Feb 2008 18:29:28 GMT

I’ve known for years. It came on all of a sudden but after that there was no denying it. I never came out and said it and I think others could tell but they were too scared of saying anything and especially something that would offend me. Women knew for sure. Not all but most never looked at me the same way since. So now the opposite sex and I are like best friends because she never looks at me in a romantic way, no fear of being taken advantage of. Men obviously know and think the same thing – they see me as no threat to their romantic or sexual relationships with women or the potential relationships to women in the clubs. So there it is and time for me to just say it, the “G” word

out loud

to EVERYONE -

I am a GIMP! That’s right I am a cripple, a paraplegic and proud! Paralyzed from the mid-back, thoracic 7^th vertebrae and I don’t care who knows!

Yeah, I know you thought I was going to say something else but my sexual orientation is hetero and I love women, and making love to women. Yes I still can, although it is different but with a little consideration for things such as who’s on top, to the miracle of medication in the pills that claim they can assist even when you’re interrupted during the next 36 hours (although I do not know how it is for able bodied men with ED and if they still need to be stimulated before the magic pill goes into effect – I can say when I have taken it – it would not be good to all of sudden be interrupted and wait), and now thanks to the Intimate Rider adds motion back into the acts and eliminates the given of who is on top. Still for me it is still a personal choice of intimate relationships and either way the best part for her is that I am not in any hurry to get to my own pleasure as with the assist of the medication mentioned above only makes for a empty attached tool there is still no sensation below the waist! It is more Tantric then Kama Sutra although both are incorporated as I derive pleasure from giving pleasure so the excitement for me is exploring where and what is going to give her the best to be satisfied. And she is under no pressure to pull a Meg Ryan in “Harry Met Sally” way and instead can act and react to the erotic map that I am exploring and that doesn’t matter how long it takes!

Well it is often a subject that comes up early on when first meeting people – first is “How did you wind up in a wheelchair?” and then usually sex or sometimes indirectly using another issue that is also of interest and that is how to go to the bathroom! Subjects I just love to talk about when in public or parties! But you know what – all of this is part of the authentic voice – that can only be written by a person who has experienced it – not an able bodied person who watched a movie by other able bodied people or even by merely reading this blog. Would a movie where this was authentically represented help in society’s opinions, and in the able bodied interacting with those with a disAbility in public or a crowded party? Lessen the awkwardness that the able bodied and the disAbled have with one another thereby opening a more inclusive and accepted way of life for everyone?

Okay now that that I have your attention and provided this but one example of the issues that deserve an authentic voice, it is probably no surprise how I am frustrated and don’t know how to express it – this serious issue of disabled culture and voices and having people who have no idea what it is like to live with a disability, especially one that is as dramatic as being paralyzed – representing me and all of us with a disability in today’s entertainment.

It seems there is a haven for those who are different getting a welcomed embrace, an honest and sincere acceptance, and the heart felt support from the entire Hollywood community. Gays, lesbians, transgenders, black, brown, yellow, purple, and even green. And that could be taken in two ways, the green movement of environmental activists and as I intend it to reference Kermit the Frog’s honest song, “Being Green” or “It’s Hard Being Green” that I can so relate to. And despite that everyone of the afore mentioned minorities also have members within the disability community as whether you are born with it or is acquired later in life through disease or injury, disability does not discriminate and affects all races, nationalities, genders, social & economic class, all ages, all orientations, all political groups, all creeds as nobody is immune to the possibility of a disability – yet Hollywood feels that it is ok and completely accepted to allow someone without a disability to nearly always be the voice and deny us representing ourselves with authentic voices and portrayals.

It doesn’t matter that I cannot suddenly just come out and proclaim how I am different from the majority and how I feel about the social and economic disadvantages that are imposed on me and how I have to deal with them. How as I mentioned above even some of the basic human needs and desires do not get dismissed because they are never even considered – as a wheeler I am rarely considered a romantic and certainly not a sexual being, although I am certainly both. But those things are not important to us as human beings, right? Not important issues in our society and our culture. Sex is not important unless of course your orientation is different from the majority. Then the often scorned and forbidden love and the physical expression of it is embraced and even celebrated as “everyone is important” in Hollywood and its products that give voice to it.

But even with the very little representation those with a disability get in movies and television – we have to be content with able bodied writers, directors and actors being our voice and our representatives. Let me put this in a way that Hollywood feels is much more important – it is like having a Republican give voice and representation as a Democrat in the halls of Congress. Would that be fair? Would you feel comfortable with that? And what if that was the case in nearly every single case? Now do you feel where I am coming from?

Most of Hollywood that I have dealt with over the years somehow does not think this is a problem. As was pointed out to me from the personal opinion of a staff member (I can only assume as he was the one that answered the phones) at James Cameron’s Lightstorm Entertainment made it perfectly clear. Yet in my final question to him do you think for one moment that you as an able bodied person can understand what I go through every single day as a paraplegic, he did answer no, yet somehow it is still okay by him that someone like himself was the writer, director and actor of a paraplegic character being represented on the screen.

Well, Hollywood, I am out and I am going to make this authentic voice and representation despite how you feel. And if you keep making me feel that my art is worthless as anybody can represent what I do as a writer and director, and as a person who has no rights to express an authentic voice of those with a disability, then instead of the hundreds of phone calls, letters, faxes, emails that I have been sending you to bring attention to this, then I am going to come knocking on your doors – at your Producer/Production company offices, and at the Big 6 Studio executive’s office with a camera of my own and with your names proudly displayed on screen to ask just one question, where are the representation of your audience – the segment of 56 million Americans, a full 20% of our population, the one in four American households that have a person with a disAbility in YOUR MOVIES?

Anybody want to talk, just talk about this BEFORE it comes to this?